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Children and Teachers

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  • Children and Teachers

    TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
    MARIA: Here it is.
    TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
    CLASS: Maria!!

    TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
    FRANK: Because of the sign.
    TEACHER: What sign?
    FRANK: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

    TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
    JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

    TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
    GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L"
    TEACHER: No, that's wrong
    GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

    TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
    DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
    TEACHER: What are you talking about?
    DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

    TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years
    WINNIE: Me!

    TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
    GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

    TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
    MILLIE: I is...
    TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
    MILLIE: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

    TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also
    admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
    LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

    TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
    SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

    TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your
    brother's. Did you copy his?
    CLYDE: No, teacher, it's the same dog.

    TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no
    longer interested?
    HAROLD: A teacher.
    "There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says 'yes,' you know he is a crook." Groucho Marx

  • #2
    Keep 'em coming Bob. Your funnies are always good for a laugh.


    Last edited by muppet; 06-09-2006, 01:21 PM.