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Last Night

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  • Last Night

    Marty wakes up at home with a huuuge hangover.
    He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirin and a glass of water on the side table. He sits up and sees his clothing laid out on a chair in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and notices that it is in perfect order..... spotless. And strangely, so's the rest of the house. He takes the aspirin and notices a note on the table "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you."

    So, he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning paper waiting for him. His son is also at the table having his morning meal.

    Marty asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

    His son says, "Well, you came home after 3am, drunk and delirious. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."

    Confused, Marty asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

    His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, "Lady, leave me alone, I'm a married man!"
    "There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says 'yes,' you know he is a crook." Groucho Marx