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Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder

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  • Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder

    Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
    Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
    Somehow I feel better even though I have it!!This is how it manifests:

    I decide to water my garden.
    As I turn on the hose near the driveway,

    I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

    As I start toward the garage,

    I notice mail on the porch table that
    I brought up from the letter box earlier.

    I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

    I lay my car keys on the table,

    Put the junk mail in the waste paper basket
    under the table and notice that it is now full.

    So, I decide to leave the bills

    on the table and take out the rubbish first.

    But then I think,

    No I will pay the Bills first
    before I take out the rubbish.

    I take my cheque book off the table,

    And see that there is only one cheque left.

    My extra cheques are in my desk in the study,

    So I go inside the house to my desk where
    I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.

    I'm going to look for my cheques,
    But first I need to push the Coke aside
    so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

    The Coke is getting warm,
    so I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

    As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke,
    A vase of flowers on the counter
    Catches my eye-they need water.

    I put the Coke on the counter and
    discover my reading glasses that
    I've been searching for all morning.
    I decide I better put them back on my desk,
    but first I'm going to water the flowers.

    I set the glasses back down on the counter,

    fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
    Someone left it on the kitchen table.

    I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,

    I'll be looking for the Remote,
    But I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,
    so I decide to put it back in the Study where it belongs,
    But first I'll water the flowers.

    I pour some water in the flowers,

    But quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

    So, I set the Remote back on the table,

    get some towels and wipe up the spill.

    Then, I head down the hall trying to

    remember what I was planning to do.

    At the end of the day:

    The car isn't washed
    The bills aren't paid,
    There is a warm can of
    Coke sitting on the counter,
    The flowers don't have enough water,
    There is still only 1 cheque in my cheque book,
    I can't find the remote,
    I can't find my glasses,
    And I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

    Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,

    I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day,
    And I'm really tired.

    I realize this is a serious problem,

    And I'll try to get some help for it,
    But first I'll check my e-mail....

    Do me a favor.

    Forward this message to everyone you know,
    Because I don't remember who I've sent it to.

    Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!
    "There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says 'yes,' you know he is a crook." Groucho Marx