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  • Tokoroa: One for Muppet.

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    Tokoroa Appeal

    Massive storms hit Tokoroa in the late hours of 19th November 2008. Victims
    were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering 'Faaackinell'.

    The storms devastated the area causing approximately $30 worth of damage.
    Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were
    woken well before their Work and Income cheques arrived.

    The South Waikato News reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
    bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that
    something interesting had happened in Tokoroa.

    One resident - Tina Ngahuria Kauwhakahaere Aroha Smith Brown, a 15-year-old
    mother of 3 said 'It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came
    running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Dunhill and Jack Daniels,
    slept through it all.'

    Apparently, looting, muggings and car crime were unaffected and carried on as
    normal. The New Zealand Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of
    'Waikato' beer to the area to help the stricken locals.

    Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large
    quantities of personal belongings, including Community Services Cards,
    jewellery from The Warehouse, and Bone China from Countdown.


    HOW CAN YOU HELP?

    This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
    unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought
    after - items most needed include: flannelette shirts, Fubu jeans or puffer
    jackets, bandanas (blue in colour, definitely NOT red), jandals and any other
    items usually sold in South Auckland markets. Food parcels may be harder to
    come by, but are needed all the same.

    Required foodstuffs urgently needed include: Fish and Chips, KFC, Baked
    beans, Ice cream, Chips, Fizzy drinks.

    Donations of $22.00 will be taken to buy a packet of Port Royal 30 grams and
    a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

    **Breaking news**
    Tokoroa's local Church has cancelled their local 'Nativity Display' due to
    their inability to find three wise men or a virgin. Please don't forward
    this to anyone living in Tokoroa - oh, stuff it, they won't be able to read
    it, anyway!

  • #2
    Laughed out loud at that one Glen...choice one bro!

    Comment


    • #3
      South Auckland Appeal

      Massive storms hit the Manuwera area in the late hours of 19th November 2008. Victims
      were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering 'Faaackinell'.

      The storms devastated the area causing approximately $30 worth of damage.
      Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were
      woken well before their Work and Income cheques arrived.

      The NZ Herald reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
      bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that
      something interesting had happened in Manuwera.

      One resident - Tina Ngahuria Kauwhakahaere Aroha Smith Brown, a 15-year-old
      mother of 3 said 'It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came
      running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Dunhill and Jack Daniels,
      slept through it all.'

      Apparently, looting, muggings and car crime were unaffected and carried on as
      normal. The New Zealand Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of
      'Waikato' beer to the area to help the stricken locals.

      Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large
      quantities of personal belongings, including Community Services Cards,
      jewellery from The Warehouse, and Bone China from Countdown.


      HOW CAN YOU HELP?

      This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
      unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought
      after - items most needed include: flannelette shirts, Fubu jeans or puffer
      jackets, bandanas (blue in colour, definitely NOT red), jandals and any other
      items usually sold in South Auckland markets. Food parcels may be harder to
      come by, but are needed all the same.

      Required foodstuffs urgently needed include: Fish and Chips, KFC, Baked
      beans, Ice cream, Chips, Fizzy drinks.

      Donations of $22.00 will be taken to buy a packet of Port Royal 30 grams and
      a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

      **Breaking news**
      One of Manuwera's local Churches has cancelled their local 'Nativity Display' due to
      their inability to find three wise men or a virgin. Please don't forward
      this to anyone living in Manuwera - oh, stuff it, they won't be able to read
      it, anyway!
      "There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says 'yes,' you know he is a crook." Groucho Marx

      Comment


      • #4
        Awesome Glen! Muppet, that's the weakest comback I've ever seen. Did you stay up all night coming up with that one?

        David
        PS: And hey, I grew up in Manurewa. It's now much worse than you portray.
        Squadly dinky do!

        Comment


        • #5
          Nup.

          Just like Glen, only changed a few words.
          "There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says 'yes,' you know he is a crook." Groucho Marx

          Comment


          • #6
            I could could change it to Aranui, Christchurch if you prefer.

            Comment


            • #7
              Glen I did have a real laugh at that one, you are so funny, My husband would be impressed I normally don't see the funny side of most jokes.

              Comment


              • #8
                Classic !! and the funny thing is its true doh !!

                Shane lives at www.nexusproperty.co.nz
                Hot property deal alerts

                Comment

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