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You know you're Australian if....

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  • You know you're Australian if....

    You know you're Australian if....
    You believe that stubbies can either be worn or drunk

    You think it is normal to have a Prime Minister called Kevin

    You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs' refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds

    You believe the 'L' in the word ' Australia ' is optional

    You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas'

    You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep

    You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'

    You believe is makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin

    You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'

    You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis

    You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them

    You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, while 'scuse me' is alway polite

    You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse'

    You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle

    Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules of beach cricket

    You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'

    When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in fruit

    When working at a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer

    You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem and then have trouble remembering the second.
    "There's one way to find out if a man is honest-ask him. If he says 'yes,' you know he is a crook." Groucho Marx