FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT MEN
1. "What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse'." Francois Morency
2. "The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things." Jilly Cooper
3. "Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code...he turned himself in." Rita Rudner
4. "Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable." Cher.
5. "I married beneath me. All women do." Nancy Astor
6. "A genius is a man who can rewrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over." Dino Levi.
7. "I'm glad I'm not bisexual; I couldn't stand being rejected by men as well as women." Bernard Manning.
8. "You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent? That's why I never take baths." Steven Wright.
9. "There are three stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus; he doesn't believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus." Bob Philips
10. "An extravagance is anything you buy that is of no earthly use to your wife." Franklin Adams
Love the Santa one...
1. "What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse'." Francois Morency
2. "The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things." Jilly Cooper
3. "Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code...he turned himself in." Rita Rudner
4. "Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable." Cher.
5. "I married beneath me. All women do." Nancy Astor
6. "A genius is a man who can rewrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over." Dino Levi.
7. "I'm glad I'm not bisexual; I couldn't stand being rejected by men as well as women." Bernard Manning.
8. "You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent? That's why I never take baths." Steven Wright.
9. "There are three stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus; he doesn't believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus." Bob Philips
10. "An extravagance is anything you buy that is of no earthly use to your wife." Franklin Adams
Love the Santa one...
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